Wow, what a life
Sometimes I struggle with fully appreciating the life I have, because I find my self being so busy trying to improve it. With time I've not only realised this about myself but also how many of you out there are sharing this habit of mine.
Of course perfection can't be reached by constant improvement, it needs to be a balance between acceptance and growth. I, myself, prefer being around people who are very good at being none perfect and happy with that. It makes my heart lighter and me feel like the pressure is off. Which makes me happy.
So sometimes I catch my self pushing and pushing and pushing, creating discomfort and worries not only in my self, but also in the people around me. And then I instantly need to tell my self to stop. Take a few breaths and stop it all. The have to's, the must do's, the shouldn't, the mustn't , the can't... and just stop, turn off the head for a moment and just turn up the heart. The feeling, the receiving, the being, the loving, the thanking and the accepting.
There needs to be a balance between them both, and the head needs to learn how to bow to the heart.
And how much don't I have to be grateful for? Wow, there's a lot. Not only am I living in one of the most beautiful places on earth, with clean air and pure spring water and wonderful nature (which should be enough right there), but I also live in an amazingly supportive community, where I have the opportunity live and heal with through dance, yoga, meditations, hikes, climbs, creativity and women circle rituals. On top of this I have the chance to live with two of my favourite people on this planet; my childhood friend and my Wanaka soul sister. I have a house in my name and for the first time my own garden where I can pick my herbs and food. I work in a place I belong; an organic health shop. I have a wonderful health, plenty of time to just be and routines in my life that heals and strengthens me.
All of this is in my life, and yet, sometimes I can't see it because I'm too busy worrying about how to make it better, or I'm stuck in all that went 'wrong'. Logically, it sounds insane to me. And yet, I, and so many others, do this on a daily basis. How crazy is that!
So this is one of days where I just stopped. Stopped it all, to just be. And every time I do that, love literally vibrates through my whole body.
Wow. What a life.